I Wish I'd Patented...

I should know better, but I still read the comments on articles about patent litigation. For some reason in every comment section there is always a bunch a posters who think they are the first person to say:

I wish I’d patented [obvious thing] because I’d be rich now.

So whether it’s breathing, or patenting things, or fire, or speech, or something else.

My wish… I wish I’d patented trolling, misinformed posts about patenting obvious things.

Do I have to sue myself now?